Eid Mubark Joke.1
Ek din hamare annsoon humse pooch baithe, humey roz -roz kyon bulate ho,
Humne kaha hum yaad to unhe karte hain tum kyon chale aate ho.
Posted at 11:30 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Tumhari Ankhen.
Tumhari Aankhen Jheel Si Gehri Hain.
Ji Chahta Hai k In Main Doob Kay Marr Jaon....
__\('',)/__
-,-,-,-,-,-,-,-
Vi Minu baar Kaddo Oye.
Main Tay Mazak Kita Si.
Posted at 5:20 PM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Chappal Chor
Radio Aur T.V par Abhi Abhi Suna Hai K Masjidon Se
Chappal Aur Lotay Chor Pakra Gaya Hai.
Tum Kidhar Ho?
Tujhe Meri Qasam Tasalli K Liye 1 Miscall De Do Jaldi Se.
Posted at 11:50 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Ik BayWafaa Insaan
O Ghareeb Insaan
O Kanjoos Insaan
O Pathar Dil Insaan
O Khud Gharz Insaan
O Matlabi Insaan
O Bewafa Insaan
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Is SMS Main Maine Aapko Insaan Kaha Aapko Bura To Nahi Laga?
Posted at 11:49 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
A Nice Gift.
Ye Form Fill Karen:
Name: ___
F/Name: ___
Caste: ___
Blood Group: ___
Age: ___
Address: ___
Aur Pagal Khany Mai Jama karwa k Apny Ghar walo ko Aazadi ka Tohfa Do.
Posted at 11:46 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Not Responding at The Moment.
If U need ADVICE
MSG me
If U need a Friend
CALL ME
If U need Help
E-MAIL me
If U need Money
The number you have dialed is not responding at the moment. plz don't try again .
Posted at 1:18 AM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
A Woman's Shoe.
A Woman met a Man
Walking along the Streets
Wearing only one shoe.
She asked: "Just Lost A Shoe?"
He answered: "Nope, Just Found One"
Posted at 1:17 AM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
A Tourist.
A tourist saw a road sign that read "No through Way. Please Go Another Way."
He looked ahead and saw nothing wrong at all. He decided to go on, thinking the sign was a kind of joke.
After a while he saw a broken bridge and had to turn back. When he came to the sign on the road, he saw these words on its backside: "Welcome to Come Back. You Fool!"
Posted at 1:17 AM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Honton Kay Lafz.
Uske Honton ko dekha To meray Dil me Khayal aaya.
Woh Lafz kitnay Nashelay Hongay jo Inhay chho kar guzarty hongay.
Posted at 1:15 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Saal 2009.
Zara Sambhal k
Ziyada Bhari Cheezain mat uthana.
Waqt pe Khana.
Waqt pe Sona.
Apna Khayal Rakhna.
Q
k
Nawan Maheena Chal Raha Hai Naa
.
.
.
.
2009 ka.
Posted at 1:14 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Eid Mubark Wishes in Advance.
Wishing you Happy Eid Mubarak in advance,
For the following 10 Years.
2009
2010
2011
2012
2013
2014
2015
2016
2017
2018
Agar Coming 10 Years main aapko koi Pehle Wish karne ka dawa kary.
To Ek Rakh k chamat dena aur ye msg dikha dena. Ok?
Posted at 1:09 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Teray Na Aanay Say.
Bohat Udaas Hai Har Shakhs Ter Jany Se.
Ho saky to Loat Aa Kisi Bahany Se.
Tu Laakh Khafa Sahi, Magar Ik Baar To Dekh.
Mohallahy Main Kitna KACHRA JAMA HAI TERE NA AANY SE.
Posted at 1:07 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Aftaari Kay Waqt.
Aapki Muhabbat, Aapki Wafa He Kaafi Hai.
Tamam Umar Ye Aasra He Kaafi Hai.
Aftaari Pe Bulao Humain Par Takleef Na Karna.
Mere Liye Sirf
Khajoor
Juice
Samosay
Pakkoray
Angoor
Apple
Amrood
Banana
Pizza
Drum Stick
Chicken Roll
Kabab
Sajji
Chargha
Biryani
Zarda
Qorma
Mutton
Tikka
Custard
Kheer
Raita
Salad
Aur
Coca Cola He Kaafi Hai.
Posted at 1:01 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Aik Chaand Ki Talash.
_/\_
>,"<
_/\_
>",<
_/\_
>,"<
_/\_
>",<
Ye Sitaray Chaand ko Talash Kar Rahy Hain.
Par Chand To Aapko Msg Karny Main Masroof Hai.
Posted at 1:00 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Changing the Idea.
An Idea Can Change Your Life
But,
A Woman can change your IDEA..
So,
Always change
Women to change IDEAS
WHAT AN IDEA. ;-)
Posted at 12:59 AM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Khyber Mail
Pathan was waiting 4 Train with His Wife
Train Aai, Uper Likha Tha "Khyber Mail"
Pathan Bhag kar Charh gaya. Aur Biwi se kaha:
Jab "Khyber Female" Aye To Tm b Charh Jana.
Posted at 12:58 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Chappal Ka Masla.
Pathan Chappal Aagy Rakh k Namaz Parh Raha Tha:
Ek Aadmi ne Kaha: Chappal Aagy Rakhny se Namaz Nahi Hoti...
Pathan: Aur Peeche Rakhny se Chappal Nahi Hoti.
Posted at 12:58 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Saghi Behen.
Pathan: Yaar Hamara Biwi Humko Chhor kar Chala Gaya.
Friend: Tum Usko Pyaar Nahi karta Hoga.
Pathan: O Nahi! Qasam Khuda Ka, Saga Behen Samajhta Tha Usko.
Posted at 12:57 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Abba on Vibration.
Aik Pathan Malaria se Kaanp raha tha:
Doctor: Aaya or Pucha kia huwa hai?
Uske bete ne kaha: Bemaari ka to pata nahi!
Par Abba subha se "Vibration" pe lage huye hain.
Posted at 12:53 AM | Category: Urdu Joke | 0 Comments
Is Computer Male or Female?
As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., "Steady as she goes" or "She's listing to starboard, Captain!")
Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should also be referred to as being female.
Their reasons for drawing this conclusion follow:
Five reasons to believe computers are female:
1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you."
4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
However, another group of computer scientists, (all female) think that computers should be referred to as if they were male. Their reasons follow:
Five reasons to believe computers are male:
1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
3. As soon as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
5. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
Posted at 7:06 PM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Quotes on Computer.
What is a computer's first sign of old age?
Loss of memory.
What does a baby computer call his father?
Data.
What is an astronaut's favorite key on a computer keyboard?
The space bar.
What happened when the computer fell on the floor?
It slipped a disk.
Why was there a bug in the computer?
It was looking for a byte to eat.
What is a computer virus?
A terminal illness.
To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer.
Computers are not intelligent.
They only think they are.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
My computer isn't that nervous. It's just a bit ANSI.
The attention span of a computer is as long as its electrical cord.
Posted at 7:05 PM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Funny Computer Acronyms.
PCMCIA
People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN
It Still Does Nothing
APPLE
Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
SCSI
System Can't See It
DOS
Defective Operating System
BASICBill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control
IBM
I Blame Microsoft
DEC
Do Expect Cuts
CD-ROM
Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
OS/2
Obsolete Soon, Too.
WWW
World Wide Wait
MACINTOSH
Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
PENTIUM
Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
COBOL
Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
AMIGA
A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction
LISP
Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis
MIPS
Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
WINDOWS
Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
GIRO
Garbage In Rubbish Out
MICROSOFT
Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only (for) Fools (&) Teenagers.
Posted at 7:03 PM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Worm or Virus?
Is windows virus or worm?
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1.They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2.Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3.Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too.
4.Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
5.Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
Posted at 7:01 PM | Category: English Joke | 0 Comments
Mirrors.
Why does a mirror appear to invert the left-right directions, but not up-down?
Answer:
Mirrors invert front to back, not left to right.
Posted at 1:40 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
Soap into the Kitchen.
A boy went to the kitchen and saw his dad having difficulty holding the bar of soap.
"What's wrong, Dad?" the boy inquired.
"Oh, I think this soap must have some sort of acid in it, it is so slippery."
"No, Dad, the soap doesn't have an acid in it. Don't you remember your basic chemistry?"
How did the boy know this?
Answer:
First, soap usually does not have an acid in it: it has a base. There are properties of soap that can prove it has a base and not an acid. Soap is slippery as the father said, because bases are slick, while acids are not. Second, soap is bitter, not sour: bases are bitter, while acids are sour. Finally, soap turns red litmus paper blue, a tell-tale sign that you have a base.
Posted at 1:39 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
How Fast is your Car?
When you are driving a car down the street at a hundred miles an hour, in reality you are moving much faster.
How?
Answer:
The earth is flying through space fairly fast, so you are moving at different speeds, greater than a hundred miles an hour.
The hundred miles an hour on the car may add to or subtract from your total speed. You are only moving 100 miles an hour in relation to the road. In space, your motion is much faster and much more complicated.
Posted at 1:37 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
Balloon
One day, a boy noticed a man selling balloons that he was blowing up by himself. Being a young child, he was excited and ran to get one. When he bought it, however, it wouldn't float up in the air. Why is that?
Answer:
It wouldn't fly simply because it was mouth blown. When it floats up, it's because of the type of gas inside it, which is helium. Helium is less dense than air, so it floats. Carbon dioxide, on the other hand, is not.
Posted at 1:34 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
Horizontal Lines Problem.
Do the straight horizontal gray lines look curvy to you? Hold up a piece of paper to prove that they are straight and parallel to each other.
Posted at 1:32 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
Rotating Spiral
Look at the red dot in the middle and move your head towards and away from the screen. See how the outer rings appear to rotate?
Posted at 1:23 AM | Category: Puzzle | 0 Comments
Silvester Stallone v/s Robert Deniro Imitation
Posted at 12:53 AM | Category: Video Mall | 0 Comments